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Lifestyle Weddings

How do you handle the dilemma of when to issue 'plus one' invitations?

As Sam and I were putting together our guest list and reaching out for addresses, we started to receive some feedback about the "plus one" situation. I never really thought about it before but this has now raised some serious questions and debate on who, when and why a "plus one" should be included. And as all things wedding-planning go, the opinions are endless … and all different, of course!

With this, I’ve developed a rule of thumb, if you will, for how we are determining if a guest receives a plus one.

 You receive a plus one if:

  • You’re in the bridal party
  • You’re married
  • We are friends with your significant other (boyfriend/girlfriend)
  • You’re engaged AND you’re a close friend AND we know your significant other
  • We have guests who are unable to attend then we will let you know that we’d be happy for you to bring a guest with you (but this will not be indicated on your original invitation)
  • You won’t know many other people at the wedding and it would be uncomfortable for you to attend alone

 Your children are invited if:

  • They are over the age of 12 and we know them personally or have some relationship to them
  • You’re a family member traveling in from out of town
  • Your child is related to one of us (niece, cousin, etc.)
  • They’re super cute and we need a flower girl/ring bearer (just kidding…maybe…)

 What do you think? Will this work? Any other suggestions? I’d love to hear insight on the whole plus one scenario from other brides, wedding experts or recently married couples on how they handled this awkward and confusing situation.

And stay tuned because when we get to the invitation stage of planning, I’m sure I’ll have more thoughts on plus one and how to include it on the invites. Even better, I’ll also touch on how to handle the uninvited plus one … how awkward that will be.

Copyright © 2014, The Baltimore Sun
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