Ask Amy

  • Couple's separation leads to rift in family

    Couple's separation leads to rift in family

    Dear Amy: My brother and his wife are divorcing. My brother has been abusive and an alcoholic throughout the marriage. I have always sided with my sister-in-law. I have cared for my niece and nephew over the years as well. Now my brother is committed to rehab and doing very well. I am now a support...

  • Pool access leads to pilfered property

    Pool access leads to pilfered property

    Dear Amy: I have three sisters-in-law. I have been a part of their family for 15 years. We all get along (for the most part). Recently, my husband and I purchased a home. We have an open-door policy for people to come and use our pool. We also host family gatherings. At our latest gathering, I...

  • Senior wants to go for the gold in his 'golden years'

    Senior wants to go for the gold in his 'golden years'

    Dear Amy: I am 74; my wife of 53 years is 71. Our marriage is solid, and it is my strongest desire to support my wife in every way possible, especially giving her things that we may not have had resources for in our younger years. I am blessed to be very healthy, and I am an avid exerciser, now...

  • Password sharing reveals ex's texts

    Password sharing reveals ex's texts

    Dear Amy: My boyfriend of six months has really opened himself up to me. He gave me his social media account passwords and has added my thumbprint to his phone (which I find really cute because I didn’t really ask him for it). I trust him. I noticed that his ex has been texting him. This wouldn’t...

  • Family estrangement baffles parents

    Family estrangement baffles parents

    Dear Amy: Our adult son “James” lives on his own and has a successful career. Suddenly, without notice or explanation, James has cut off all communication with his two loving parents — myself and my wife. Just three months ago we were all together enjoying a birthday lunch (for me), where James...

  • Father-son driving lesson takes wrong turn

    Father-son driving lesson takes wrong turn

    Dear Amy: My son recently received his learner’s permit to drive. The other day, backing out of a driveway, he hit our neighbor’s mailbox. My husband was with him and admittedly was not paying attention at that moment. The owner was nice about it and they agreed to have my son and husband replace...

  • Physician is told to heel himself

    Physician is told to heel himself

    Dear Amy: I am a physician and a widower. Most important, I’m the father of a brilliant and deeply inquisitive 12-year-old girl. I have raised my daughter (by myself) since she was 6 months old. We are very close. I noticed signs that she would soon be experiencing puberty, and I knew she would...

  • Grieving teen boy ponders possible crush

    Grieving teen boy ponders possible crush

    Dear Amy: First of all, I am a 15-year-old guy. Unfortunately, I lost my mother to cancer only six months ago. I tend to overthink things, and that’s why I’m writing to you. I am not sure whether I have a crush on this person at my school, or if I am just longing for someone to fill the empty space....

  • Wife hates husband's secret lingerie habit

    Wife hates husband's secret lingerie habit

    Dear Amy: I have been married almost 15 years to a man I first knew in high school. I became aware of his problem several years ago when I found a bra hanging in our laundry room that was not my size. Finally, my husband confessed he’d bought it for himself. He said it was a one-time occurrence....

  • Woman's #MeToo moments lead to despair

    Woman's #MeToo moments lead to despair

    Dear Amy: I have a history of attracting unkind, angry men. I had recently come off a two-year break from dating when my mom’s neighbor asked me out. He is about my age, and my mom liked him. He seemed like a nice guy, so I took a chance. I think he had been drinking before he picked me up. He...

  • Well-off parent doesn't like friends' braggy child

    Well-off parent doesn't like friends' braggy child

    Dear Amy: We live in a well-off neighborhood. We all socialize together. My husband and I have one child. We like to travel and do exciting things. We do not lavish our child with an abundance of toys; we feel that experiences are more important. We were close friends with another couple with two...

  • Long distance may force a choice: Partner or child

    Long distance may force a choice: Partner or child

    Dear Amy: I’ve been with my partner for four years. We lived together for two years until his job took him six hours away. We have been maintaining our relationship long distance. Our plan has always been for him to move this summer in order to be with me in my career following school. Marriage...

  • Man shocked to discover family friend is an adult film star

    Man shocked to discover family friend is an adult film star

    Dear Amy: There is a 31-year-old woman who has been a part of our family since she was a teenager. She and my kids grew up together and they are still good friends. Her parents are good friends of my wife and me. She is Phi Beta Kappa and graduated magna cum laude from a good college. She has a...

  • Family friend is shocked by woman's film career

    Family friend is shocked by woman's film career

    Dear Amy: There is a 31-year-old woman who has been a part of our family since she was a teenager. She and my kids grew up together and they are still good friends. Her parents are good friends of my wife and me. She is Phi Beta Kappa and graduated magna cum laude from a good college. She has a...

  • Annual review provides temptation to undercut supervisor

    Annual review provides temptation to undercut supervisor

    Dear Amy: My supervisor, “Angie,” works hard at her job. She provides me with much valuable support and guidance. She is also the mother of a toddler, and as such she has negotiated to work 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. Monday through Thursday; she takes care of her child on Fridays. A few times a year, we...

  • Silver dater meets Mr. Corvette

    Silver dater meets Mr. Corvette

    Dear Amy: I am a 60-year-old woman, out of the dating scene for many years. I met a wonderful man on an online dating site. We spoke for a couple of weeks and then met for dinner. He lives two hours away, so I got a hotel room near him for the night. He picked me up in a brand-new Corvette and...

  • Friend wants her bestie to give up the ghost

    Friend wants her bestie to give up the ghost

    Dear Amy: My best friend, “Maria,” whom I’ve known since high school, has ghosted me three times within the last four years. Maria is like a sister to me. She is the godmother to my kids, as I am to hers. When we reconnect after her silence (which lasts months), it is because I initiate it. She...

  • Rape victim wonders if childhood assault was her fault

    Rape victim wonders if childhood assault was her fault

    Dear Amy: When I was 11 years old (almost 12) I had a huge crush on this guy. He was 18, but he was like Fonzie and liked hanging around the younger crowd. Someone we both knew told him I liked him, and one day he said he was going to camp in the hills where I lived. He asked if I wanted to come...

  • Physician's symptoms could be sign of illness

    Physician's symptoms could be sign of illness

    Dear Amy: My son-in-law is a physician at a large hospital. He is exceptionally smart and well-regarded, but he’s also incredibly dumb at the same time. His errors, goofs and mistakes have gotten so bad that we often think twice before inviting him and my daughter anywhere. He is a one-man debacle....

  • Expectant parents want to avoid gender stereotypes

    Expectant parents want to avoid gender stereotypes

    Dear Amy: My husband and I are expecting our first baby. We would prefer to avoid all hyper-gendered baby trappings. For us, this goes beyond the usual pink and blue, as we’ve seen baby clothing with incredibly sexist language — e.g., “Born to shop” or “Future trophy wife” for girls and “Lock up...

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