Only a few more episodes of “True Blood” await us, which is fortunate, because I am over this series.
When we left off, Violet was kidnapping children, Bill and Sookie were having sex and Sarah Newlin was holed up in the Fellowship of the Sun having a series of hallucinations.
At the top of the episode, Sarah is still cowering inside the Fellowship. Finally accepting that she is going to die, Sarah goes out to meet Eric, Pam and the Yakanomo Corp. goons, welcoming death. Eric pounces, holding her by the neck as he prepares to kill, until Pam stops him by pointing a wooden bullet-loaded gun at her own heart. If he dies, she dies.
Sarah/Numi is convinced that she’s the messiah because -- of course -- she thinks she’s going to be reborn as the “Princess of Peace.” Out-maneuvered by his first progeny, Eric drinks from Sarah and tosses her to the ground. Within moments, the Hep V veins begin to disappear.
Which leads me back to my thing about being ready for this show to wrap up. Who actually believed they’d kill off Eric Northman, in the first place? No one? Right.
Cue the theme song.
Sookie and Bill re-consummated their stupid love …and now they are engaging in a bit of pillow talk. Yawn. Vomit. Bleh.
Bill offers a “penny for [her] thoughts.” She finally brings up Queen Sophie Anne (which hasn’t happened in eons and is something I resent. Evan Rachel Wood RULED as the vampire queen of Louisiana), asking why the Queen wanted her. Turns out, Sophie Anne wanted to breed Sookie.
You read that right. She knew that the fairies and halflings of the world would soon be taken to that weird fairy kingdom where Sookie ran into her grandfather that time and fought evil fairies that looked like something out of “The Witches.” Naturally, Sookie is disgusted, but asks one more question: why didn’t he deliver? Because she reminded him of his humanity with her love, and all he gave her back was darkness.
They sicken me.
Lettie and Lafayette are still digging Rev. Daniels is dismayed to find them digging in the front yard of the home Lettie and Tara shared years ago. He apologizes to the family and asks them to keep the news of the “Reverend’s wife and her substance…issues” quiet. Lafayette and Lettie assure him that the V has worn off. They are just following the path Tara left.
That becomes even harder for Rev. Daniels to believe when James shows up to give them another dose. But after a heartfelt speech from Lettie, Rev. Daniels drinks from James, as well.
Sure enough, there is Tara, standing in the doorway. She leads them inside, where there's a flashback to one of Tara’s birthday parties. Things were going well, until Tara’s alcoholic father showed up, wondering where Lettie got the money for the party and trashing the cake before smacking his wife in the face and rooting around in some boxes for his gun.
Turns out, Tara hid it in her dresser. Picking it up gingerly, she walks into the living room and aims it at her father. She doesn’t pull the trigger, but instead starts to bury the gun in the front yard. Her dad leaves and Lettie is distressed.
Adult Tara apologizes to Lettie for being unable to pull the trigger, but Lettie tells her that it wasn’t up to her to save her mama. She says she was weak, but Tara says she was just a victim of circumstances. She wants her mother to forgive herself and let her go. It’s touching and it’s the moment that this family needed in order to heal. I’m still not over Tara’s off-screen death, but this was a good payoff.
A lover’s spat, a kidnapping and some unfinished business As Hoyt sorts through his late mother’s things, Jason and Brigette look at old photos. When Brigette makes an off-hand comment about maybe someday having children, it starts an awkward argument about their future, which understandably makes Jason uncomfortable.
Just as things really start to get awkward, he gets a few texts from Violet: pictures of Jessica and the kids bound and gagged, with an address. He heads out and Brigette, fed up with Hoyt, decides to go with him, no matter what the danger is.
Definitely not saying a lot for her character’s development. You’re mad, so you decide to tag along on police business, which could possibly end up endangering your life and the lives of others? OK. She does, however, listen to Jason when he tells her to stay in the car with a loaded gun at the ready.
Inside, Jason is quickly snatched up by Violet, who delivers a monologue about her evil plan, as villains do. Basically, she’s pissed that Jason cheated on her. He’s the first man to ever do so in centuries -- she used to bring great men to their knees and Cleopatra and Helen of Troy were empty shells or whatever.
Now, she plans to torture Wade, Adilyn, Jess and Jason using some medieval weaponry she’s had stored up in Monroe, La., forever.
I have to admit, as far as evil plans go, this one is pretty sick. It involves ripping off Wade’s fingers and Adilyn’s breasts, draining Adilyn and then raping Jess for days on end with a burning hot dildo. All of this because Jason cheated and ruined her hopes of living with a man with “no intellect” who worshiped her for the “perfect creature” that she felt she was. Goodness.
Her speech is cut short when Hoyt sneaks in and shoots her from behind. I know we complain about storylines being drawn out forever on this show, but how many Big Bads can they toss at us in one season? There are only a few more episodes to go, and we still don’t know what the stakes are.
Anyway, Jess looks pretty excited to see Hoyt…until Brigette comes in. She chats up Hoyt and Brigette starts to get a teensy bit jealous. Later, Jess and Jason have a much-needed talk. The gist is that she never felt betrayed by him and their relationship was the most uncomplicated one she’s ever had. JASON AND JESS 4-EVER.
Unfortunately, the next day at Bellefleur’s, Hoyt tells Jason that he cares for Brigette, but “there’s just something about Jessica.” Jason tells him about Bill’s impending death (just die already, dude!), but that’s not enough to make him leave it alone. He goes over to Bill’s and Jess lets him in.
Hoyt comes bearing gifts: a bag of his own blood, so they don’t have to worry about groceries. Jessica’s obviously moved, but there is so much drama here -- not just the bad history between she, Hoyt and Jason, but the fact that Violet killed his mother for shooting Jess.
Return to Fangtasia and Bon Temps Despite the fact that Yakanomo’s doctors have already synthesized Sarah’s blood, Mr. Gus (whose drawl I never want to stop listening to) says it will still take longer for New Blood to go to market. Instead of an antidote, they want to create a “healthy habit,” thereby increasing their profits.
Eric and Pam agree to keep the antidote a secret until New Blood is perfected, which turns out to be more easily said than done when Eric visits Sookie. He’s obviously upset that she slept with Bill, but promises to come back tomorrow night to help. Which leads to Sookie stupidly running into the night, wearing her resolved face. Nothing good happens after Sookie makes her resolved face.
So Sookie’s stupid behind drives to Fangtasia after daybreak. The Yakanomo goons aren’t happy to see her, but after getting Mr. Gus’s permission, they allow her in. Eric tries to play it cool, pretending Sookie is just another fangbanger. Mr. Gus calls his bluff by threatening to kill her, but Eric is too smart for him. He warns Gus that her brother is with the sheriff’s department and pretends to glamour Sookie in order to get her to leave.
Unfortunately, Sookie cued into Mr. Gus’s thoughts about “what’s downstairs,” so you know she’s going to go investigate. She heads back to Fangtasia and uses her fairy light to blast in through the Underground Railroad vent thing. She finds Sarah bound and gagged on the floor and telepathically taps into Sarah’s memories to find out how she’s involved in all of this. Sookie leaves her there and rushes to bring Bill to Fangtasia.
With Gus on his way to Dallas, Eric and Pam venture downstairs to try to get some of Sarah’s blood for Bill. Of course, Bill, Sookie and Jess are already sneaking in through the vent, which understandably frustrates Eric.
Bill steps up to drink, hesitates and, because he is the most annoying vampire in the history of the genre, decides that he doesn’t want the blood. If he wants to die anyway, someone just stake him. Please.