Daryl Dixon (Norman Reedus) has a low tolerance for moon shine

Daryl Dixon (Norman Reedus) has a low tolerance for moon shine (Gene Page / AMC / March 3, 2014)

"What doing?"

If you sent that text message to Daryl Dixon and Beth Greene, this week's episode of "The Walking Dead" would have adequately answered your sparsely worded query.

Rather than sending a ridiculously long Snap Chat video response, Daryl and Beth served as the sole protagonists in Sunday night's episode, "Still".

These episode titles have become more and more clever, and this one refers to the moonshine house that Daryl and Beth stumble upon. (Daryl found it earlier with Michonne, did you know?) Where rednecks make moonshine is called a "still". And Daryl and Beth sit still while they get drunken. Do you see all the meanings?

I'll just cut to the chase since THEY obviously won't: when will Beth and Daryl have a hot French kiss session? I'm just waiting for them to lock lips and play some serious tonsil hockey, and maybe even have some Seven Minutes in Heaven, and then the entire studio audience would go "AHH-WOOOOOOOO!!!!" like when DJ Tanner "made time" with Steve.

I'm sure there are some people out there who are like "Daryl Dixon and Beth Greene making French kisses with each other's lips?? You're sick!" But guess what? Her character is 18, and the actress who plays her is 28, so maybe it's not sketchy and creepy after all. Yes, Daryl is well into his 30s, and the actor who plays him is 45 (!!!), but who are you to stand in the way of romance?

Besides, they haven't even kissed on the cheek yet. The big moment came when Daryl started breaking down after drinking some moonshine, and Beth gave him a nice rear embrace. You know how good that probably felt? In a time of zombies when you know not who is your friend and who might try to eat your medulla oblongata?

In the zombie apocalypse, a warm hug from an attractive young lady is probably about as exhilirating as a speed-of-light hot air balloon ride through a rainbow.

The tension was pretty strong when Daryl and Beth were having that heart-to-heart, though. If they don't at least have some hand-on-bottom action next week, I'll be very surprised.

It seemed like Daryl's game lacks a little polish. Like, hey Daryl, if you're trying to romance a young lady, you invite her into the BACK SEAT of the car, not the trunk. And if the lady wants to drink Peach Schnapps, let the lady drink Peach Schnapps. And if you're trying to set a romantic mood, maybe skinning and grubbing on a big mud snake in front of her isn't the best idea.

This episode had a few big payoffs, as Daryl at long last revealed his back story. He was not a motorcycle repairman, or a bounty hunter, or a community college philosophy professor. He was, in fact, a vagabond, basking in the boozy warmth of ne'er-do-well brother Merle's hazy shadow.

COUNTRY CLUB POLITICS

That was really cool when they stumbled across the Pine Vista Country Club. I knew it was going to be a memorable scene as soon as we saw that corpse draped across the front porch.

The scene inside was a little confusing. Like, did those hanging walkers hang themselves, or what? According to the Talking Dead, the carnage was the result of a class struggle among the country club members and the staff. It's like a much more violent "Caddyshack".

Anyway, that would explain the "Welcome to the dogtrot" graffiti, the ghastly "Rich Bitch" corpse-mannequin art fixture, and the corpses all over the place.

DID YOU KNOW?

  • The song that plays near the end of the episode is "Up The Wolves" by The Mountain Goats.
  • While other episodes have only featured two main characters, this is the first episode to have as few as two living characters (other episodes have had two main characters and additional auxiliary characters).
  • This is the first episode in Season 4 with no human deaths.
  • This is the first episode in the series with no characters from the source material. (Beth and Daryl were not characters in the graphic novel.)
  • Thanks Walking Dead Wikia!

DID YOU NOTICE?

  • Beth finds a commemorative spoon from the Washington, D.C., Capitol.
  • This episode was dedicated to Sarah Elizabeth Jones, a 27-year-old camera assistant who was tragically struck and killed by a train while filming the Gregg Allman biopic "Midnight Rider" last week in nearby Savannah, Georgia.