There was that scene where Daryl is like "Hey, you're gonna wanna see this!" and he leads Rick into the other room. First of all, I was hoping what he was gonna want to see was Hershel doing a performance of one-legged plate spinning. Second of all, when they went in there it was Carol sitting, and then everyone started getting all teary-eyed and blub-blubbing. Then later, Carl's like "Daryl's been calling her Asskicker" (That whole silly-name thing is dumb...) And he says he wants to call her Judith after his third-grade teacher. I was like, what is this, an A Perfect Circle album? I'm sorry, call me Scrooge if you want, but I don't like when they do all these high-emotion scenes. I think Andrew Lincoln (Rick) is a really good actor and does a good job of crying on command, but I'd rather see him take a sharpened cattle prod and jam it into some zombie's forehead.

Carol has nine lives, like a cat. What is she, Ernest "The Cat" Miller?

Rick's really working hard to groom Carl into the next leader. Kids have to grow up fast in the zombie apocalypse. He should still be playing Tamagotchi and Ben 10.

Tough day on set for Steven Yeun

Glenn gets beat up so bad by Merle. Wreck It Ralph reference: his face looks like Little Mac after he's gotten punched out by Super Macho Man. When Merle holds his knife-hand up against Glenn's face, Glenn is like "This is the worst shave I ever got, and I've paid for shaves at Supercuts, Hair Cuttery and Fantastic Sams!"

Then Merle uses a zombie as a torture device. "Zombie Torture Device", sick Cannibal Corpse song title...

SOO over Andrea

Last week they showed Andrea's sexy legs in the Governor's silky sheets. This week they showed her thong as she pulled on her pants. I'll admit Andrea is kind of pretty with her high cheek bones and curly blonde hair, but now that she is Hanoi Jane I don't want to see her whale tail anymore. She is also turning to the bottle more and more. Now Andrea, I love turning to the bottle as much as the next guy, but the old saying goes, you won't find the answers at the bottom of a bottle. And I don't think Johnny Drum is still plying his craft, so that hooch might run out eventually and you'll have to turn to the 'shiners.

Laying it on a little thick, aren't you Hyundai?

You can win a free Hyundai if you get all the words and enter the code. The Story Sync on AMC features Hyundai ads every five minutes. In the show, they drive a pristine Hyundai Tucson down a country road, kicking up leaves like in a car commercial. I get it, Hyundai, I get it. Maybe if you send me a free Hyundai Tucson I'll drive it around Power Plant Live! and talk about how hip it is. I'll pop my collar and be like "Yo, this Hyundai Tucson is silly fresh, kid!"

I must say, when they were loading that Tucson up for the mission to Woodbury I kind of wanted to jump up from my chair and join them. It looked like a pretty fun car camping trip. Daryl was like "I've got flash bangs and tear gas!" and I'd be like "I've got three 30 packs and a bottle of Evan Williams, six packs of hock dogs and some keilbasa!"

Melissa McBride's List of Reasons Why Carol's Hair Never Grows
(Or the infographic they inserted during a commercial break this week)

  • She's VERY proud of her ears.
  • Because big hair is sooo 80's.
  • So walkers can't grab it.
  • In the mornings she can devote more time to reading the Post Apocalypse Post.
  • Having long hair would interfere with her knitting.
  • It's short hair, dammit, it's "camouflage." It's French.
  • No anti-depressants in zombie apocalypse to treat OCD.
  • She's avoiding the inevitable risk of being mistaken for Michonne.
  • Let your hair go, if it comes back it's yours; if it doesn't, it never was.
  • Oh wait… did you mean the hair on her legs?

Looks like we've got a regular Paula Poundstone here...

Quote board

Merle: "You were an asshole out there, just like you were on that rooftop back there in Atlanta. What y'all did, leavin' me up there? People wouldn't do that to an animal."

Michonne: "The supplies were dropped by a young Asian guy, with a pretty girl."

Michonne: "Don't you ever touch me again!"

Michonne: "There's a town, Woodbury, about 75 survivors, I think they were taken there ... it's run by this guy who calls himself the Governor. Pretty boy, charming, Jim Jones type."