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'The Walking Dead' recap, episode 302: 'Sick'

Ghouls and Zombies (supernatural entities)The Walking Dead (tv program)The Blind Side (movie)John WatersHIV - AIDSScott WilsonNick Gomez

Thanks "The Walking Dead", now I no longer have to wonder what a zombie's panties look like. And I no longer have to wonder what it would be like to see a zombie in its panties have its stomach slit open with a pocket knife. It made me feel a little ashamed and sad, but there are probably some real sick puppies out there who get turned on by that kind of stuff!

To add a little context, Carol — the de facto medical point person since Doc Hershel is laid up with his severed leg — wants to do some cruel and unusual medical experiment to learn how to perform a C-section in preparation for Lori's child birth. So, instead of doing something ridiculous like finding a medical text in the prison library, she poleaxes a charming young lady zombie through the eye with a steel rod, lays it down and hikes up its dress, and then disembowels it in the middle of the prison yard.

Shockmaster John Waters should be proud.

Although that scene was the most lasting image of Sunday night's episode, appropriately titled "Sick", there were also some plot developments.

We got to meet the prisoners that were revealed at the end of last week's season premiere, and they were an interesting bunch.

I think my favorite is the little guy with the Yosemite Sam moustache who keeps saying funny things. Apparently his name is Axel. A few of his pearls of wisdom (this doesn't count as the quote board):

  • "What do you mean infected, like AIDS or something?"
  • "I can't wait for my own pot to piss in."
  • "We don't have no affiliation to what just happened. Tell him Oscar!"
  • "It was them that was bad, it wasn't us!"
  • "I like my pharmaceuticals, but I'm no killer."

There was also Big Tiny who seemed like a pretty good guy ("What about my moms?"). He sort of reminded me of the Michael Oher character in "The Blind Side". I say the Michael Oher character, because his portrayal in that movie was as such a caricature of a gentle giant that it was kind of silly. Remember when he just watched slack-jawed as a bunch of balloons floated away? Anyway, that's what Big Tiny kind of reminded me of. It's a shame he had to get his, because I thought he would have been a pretty good guy for the group, and a good fighter. Unfortunately he obviously made a big target for zombie-bone-shard-stump-back-rakes.

Justice was served, though, as his killer — they might have named him in the episode but I didn't catch it, we'll call him Esse — has his hair parted by machete courtesy of Rick. (Update: his name was Tomas. R.I.P. Tomas)

Then there is the Lil' Slugger (Andrew), who is fed to the zombies in the courtyard. I actually felt pretty sorry for him, maybe because we have the same name. :-(

"You better run," Rick tells him.

Other than that, there was a lot of posturing, sword rattling, Mexican standoffs and discussions. Oh, Hershel came to and everyone stood around him smiling and sharing good vibes.

I was kind of surprised that we didn't meet The Governor this week, or see Woodberry, or see the helicopter, or catch up with Andrea and Michonne, or see Merle, or anything outside of the prison. I'm not complaining, I mean, I knew they weren't going to keep up the all-out bloodbath that was last week's episode, but the pace has definitely slowed.

I think what we need is a good dose of antagonism and crude humor. I sure hope that was Merle Dixon hiding in the bushes at the end, spying on Carol playing doctor with that zombie co-ed.

He wouldn't! Or would he...?

I almost thought Rick was going to kill Lori there for a second! Did anyone else get that feeling? It was when they were standing out on the walkway, and he put his hand on her shoulder. For a second I thought he was going to just stab the heck out of her to get her out of the way. He has been acting strange lately, but it still would have been a huge shocker.

Rick is still just a big softy

When Hershel holds hands with Rick, the hardened leader gets all sentimental again, like when Carl saw a deer. I did think it would have been pretty funny though if he sat there for a second, and then he was like "Hey, someone wanna tell this old man to let go of my hand, before he loses another limb?"

A leg up

Hah. Wouldn't it have been funny if, when they left Hershel's big, bloody, severed leg sitting in the middle of the cafeteria, it had sprung to life (cause, you know, that's how zombies work) and started kicking all the prisoners in the bottoms like a one-legged man in an ass-kicking contest?

Prison violence is funny

We get a bit of good comic relief when the prisoners show off their brawling skills in their first encounter with the zombies. Big Tiny gives one double arm bars, and then Axel starts shivving up its stomach like he's in "Oz" or something, and then Rick and Daryl look over at them in amusement, like "Good grief!"

A missed opportunity for advertising

When Rick is breaking the news to the prisoners that everything is gone, he's like "No phones, no computers..." He could have been like "No phones, no computers, no Palm Pilots, no Dell DJs, no Bluetooth technology..." They really missed out on some good advertising bucks there.

Must be a child of the 80s

When Oscar is describing how strong the bars on the windows of the prison are, he says that "He-Man couldn't get through" them. LOL. Not the Incredible Hulk, or Super Man, but He-Man. Nice.

MMM! Delicious oats and bread crumbs!

When they go into the food storage, there are these two gigantic brown bags labeled "OATS" and "BREAD CRUMBS". Haha, what are they, Hansel and Gretel? Why don't they just eat some hay and wheat while they're at it? What are they, hosses?

The armory

I liked the scene when the prisoners were being outfitted with weapons to clear out Cell Block 4, and they're getting these big crow bars and monkey wrenches and hatchets. They could have gotten some funnier weapons too, though. Like one of those big worn out wooden hammers that the strong man at the circus uses, or some big empty oil drum for Big Tiny to bop zombies over the head with.

Thanks for the tip, Florence Nightingale

When Carol wraps the bandage around Hershel's stump, she goes "These bandages will help prevent infection." Thanks for the briliant insight, Carol.

Did you know?

  • Scott Wilson, the actor who plays Hershel, kept falling asleep during the scenes where he was in a coma. Wouldn't it be funny if he was farting and getting morning wood too?
  • Theo Crane, the actor who played Big Tiny, is a comedian and mixed martial artist from Atlanta. He is listed as 6'8", and 350 pounds.
  • Nick Gomez, the actor who played Tomas, was also in "Young Guns II" and "Dawson's Creek".

(Thanks, Talking Dead!)

Quote board

Daryl: "Who the hell are you?" Tomas: "Who the hell are you?"

Oscar: "Yo man, you got a cell phone or something that we can call our families?"

Rick: "If I so much as even catch a whiff of your scent, I will kill you."

Tomas: "You done jerking each other off?"

Tomas: "You can have a bag of corn, some tuna fish..."

Lori: "I know that I'm a s****y wife and I'm not winning any Mother of the Year awards, ...but I need you to know that not for one second do I think there's malice in your heart, so do whatever you gotta do to keep this crib safe, and do it with a clear conscience."

T-Dog: "They ain't men, they're something else."

Maggie: "Go ahead dad. It's OK, be peaceful. You don't have to fight. If it's time to go it's OK."

Rick: "Stay in a tight formation, no more of that prison riot crap."

Big Tiny: "Look guys, I'm fine, just look at me. I'm not changing into one of those things."

Rick: "Yeah, I get it, I get it. S**t happens."

Oscar: "I ain't never pleaded for my life, and I ain't about to start now. So you do what you gotta do."

Lori: "Yeah, we'll give Carl a safe place to do whatever he does these days."

Winner: Lori

What everyone is up to

Rick: Murdering prisoners, holding hands with Hershel.

Lori: Playing mind games with Rick, smelling the shoulder of her flannel shirt after he touches it.

Carl: Going on secret medical supply missions. Talking back to his mother.

Glenn: Hugging Maggie. Lucky dog!

Daryl: Pointing his crossbow at prisoners, acting tough.

Carol: Molesting a lifeless zombie.

T-Dog: Hanging around in the background, making jokes about canned goods.

Hershel: Trying to french kiss Lori when she performed rescue breathing on him, then holding hands with Rick.

Maggie: Advising unconscious Hershel to just give up and die. Sheesh, some life coach...

Beth: Ruining perfectly good Dockers slacks by tearing one leg off. Or maybe they were Haggar. You could have just used a safety pin, Beth.

Andrea: We don't know! Last we saw they were walking off with the pet zombies.

Michonne: (see above)

Best zombie kill

I'm going to go with Carol shoving the pole through that lady's eye, just because of the way she humiliated the zombie afterward by exposing its dirty underpants.

Death count

Zombies: I counted 30, for 90 on the season.

Humans: Three (Big Tiny, Tomas and Andrew)

Lingering questions
    •    Is Lori's bebo gonna turn into a zombie inside her tummy and rip her apart from the inside out?
    •    Who's in the helicopter?
    •    Where are Merle Dixon and Morgan and Duane?    •    Who was lurking in the woods spying on Carol's steamy zombie date? (I think it is either Merle or a scout from Woodberry)

A look ahead to next week's episode, "Walk With Me"

A helicopter crashes, they meet the Governor, they kill some zombies. (I want to take a minute to cry foul on these little look ahead things. Last week they basically did the same preview, and in tonight's episode we didn't see the helicopter, the Governor, or Woodberry. I don't want them to give everything away, but come on…) I do like the title of the episode, it makes me think that Rick is going to say "Walk with me," to someone, and then he's going to take them off and put them down. Or maybe it's referring to the "Twin Peaks" movie...

Copyright © 2014, The Baltimore Sun
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Ghouls and Zombies (supernatural entities)The Walking Dead (tv program)The Blind Side (movie)John WatersHIV - AIDSScott WilsonNick Gomez
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