They play football, spin on a tire-swing and kiss. They ride around the park on scooters and take a spin on the carousel. Andi thinks this is a great preview of what their lives could be like. Pants Guy tells the camera that he wishes this date could go on forever. Don’t worry, Pants Guy, it did.
This is by far the worst date in "Bachelor"/"Bachelorette" history. The only thing that could have redeemed this date would have been “old” Andi and Pants Guy in bed, with Pants Guy wearing nothing but a smile and holding a bottle of Viagra.
Night has fallen and it’s time to leave the future behind and focus on the present. Sitting down for dinner, Pants Guy thanks Andi for accepting his “quirky” self and talks about being a nerdy kid who was picked on so badly that his parents pulled him out of public school. He also talks about his fear of being alone. That, of course, was before he met Andi; now he feels comfortable and confident.
Pants Guy does a lot of talking about being “unique” and “individual” and “quirky,” which are qualities Andi admires so much that Pants Guy and his quirky pants get the rose.
Back in L.A., Unknown Ron is outside talking on the phone. He looks upset and shoos the cameras away. Moments later, Unknown Ron is upstairs packing. He comes down with his suitcase and tells the guys that a close friend passed away and he has to leave. He gives a few hugs, says goodbye to everyone, gets in a limo and drives away. Goodbye, Unknown Ron.
To add more sadness, Hair Gel Dylan opens up to Farmer Chris about wanting to share some things with Andi. Specifically, he wants to tell her about his sister dying from drugs and his brother who is now on a respirator and pronounced brain dead because of drugs. Dylan cries telling the story and is determined to tell Andi about his hardships.
Andi arrives at the cocktail party and says she feels badly for Ron because “I feel emotions for y’all.” She says Ron’s friend’s death shows how real the show is. She “chokes up,” but the real show must go on, so she toasts to a good night. For the record, Andi, death is real. This show is not.
Andi and Eric go off to talk, but just as Eric is telling her how thankful he is to have had so much alone time with her on their first date, a delivery man shows up with a huge vase filled with flowers. How the delivery guy got past the catering table and two security guards I will never know.
Andi opens the card and is unable to hide her emotions when she reads a long love note from Nick. Eric leaves Andi alone with her card, flowers and dreamy girl grin, walks out of the room and says “I got (bleeped) by a bouquet of flowers.”
Andi has forgotten all about Eric and finds Nick to thank him for the flowers. Nick says that, despite his incredible doubts about this process, he has genuine real feelings for Andi. Andi says she feels so lucky. I don’t get what she sees in Nick.
Eric may have gotten screwed by a bouquet of flowers, but Andrew is about to get (bleeped) by Pants Guy and Josh. Pants Guy, who is wearing a pair of pants that are a cross between snake skin and tree bark, really wants to get something off his chest. He pulls Josh aside and tells him that Andrew got a waitress’s phone number when they were all out to dinner a few weeks earlier. To make things worse, Andrew then bragged to the other guys about getting the phone number.
Oh the horror! Don’t worry, Andi, The Hardy Boys are on the case!
Pants Guy takes Andrew outside and has his new bodyguard, Josh, lecture Andrew on disrespect and how all the other guys are there for the right reason. Andrew listens, thinks for a moment, then gives Pants Guy and Josh a big F.U. by saying “I’m not engaging in this” and walks away.
Andrew is a smug creeper and a total douche. Pants Guy, Josh and the camera crew won’t let it go, so they follow Andrew through the mansion and up the stairs. Pants Guy whines at him the entire time, “Are you seriously doing this. Like seriously, Like really, really.”
Andrew finally slams the door in Pants Guy’s face and now we understand why Pants Guy couldn’t make it in public school.
Josh and Pants Guy fill Hair Gel Dylan in on the drama. Meanwhile, Marcus takes this opportunity to take Andi into a far-off corner and make out with her some more.
Andrew says The Hardy Boys are engaging in warfare because they see him as a threat. But Andrew believes he is a good guy, and despite being the “real victim,” he’s going to give even the “nerdy” guy and the “a--hole” the benefit of the doubt. Gee Andrew, thanks for being such a nice guy.
Andrew then lies his ass off and says that the waitress handed him her phone number and what was he supposed to do? Pants Guy and Nick, who were both in the van on the way home, call Andrew on it, but Andrew is sticking to his story. Andrew is mad because he thought they were “all in this together,” and is sad to discover this is a straight-up competitive competition. What does he think this is, "High School Musical?"
Josh says had he known about “Waitressgate” earlier, he would have confronted Andrew immediately, because he is “a grown-ass man.” Thanks for being on the case, Frank Hardy. Who cares that Andrew got the waitress’s number and why are Pants Guy and Josh acting like such little bitches about it?
Andrew eventually tires of the grilling and says he’s not going to sink to their level, not going to throw punches and not going to engage them because they aren’t worth it. He calls Pants Guy, Josh and Nick low-lifes. As opposed to admitting he is a liar. When called out, deflect.
Patrick wipes the sweat off his forehead and worries that Andrew is going to be sent home.
Nick, Josh and JJ Pants Guy have roses. Unknown Ron has gone home.
Roses go to Marcus, Brian, Marquel, Tasos, Cody, Patrick, Farmer Chris with no upper lip, Eric, Hair Gel Dylan and Andrew.
Going home? Bradley and Brett.
Brett says he was shy and nervous and should have done more. Bradley, on the other hand, has a meltdown in the driveway, complete with tears and sobbing. I was waiting for him to break into an operatic version of “All By Myself.” Goodbye, Opera Man.
See you tomorrow, when Andi cries and storms off.