Engaged couple Brendon and Rachel patch two flat tires on "The Amazing Race."

Engaged couple Brendon and Rachel patch two flat tires on "The Amazing Race." (CBS / April 16, 2012)

This week on The Amazing Race we get an African safari, and that’s just flat-out cool. Also, my on-again, off-again relationship with JJ is off. I’m done with him like I’m done with tofu, and there’s no more done than that, I tell you.
 
Once upon a time in Africa, a volcano erupted. Then plants invaded, and it became the Ngorongoro Crater. It’s lush, huge, beautiful, and full of all your favorite African animals: lions, elephants, zebras, baboons, gazelles, all of that. It’s known as the Garden of Eden, and according to BB Rachel, “It’s better than a zoo!”
 
The first part of the episode has all the teams driving through the crater on a safari. It’s nice of the Race to give them some time to appreciate their surroundings before throwing a cutthroat Double-U-Turn at them. 
 
African Life

African life is hard, okay? The Detour options are to repair a bicycle tire or to fill up several large jugs of water from a communal well. Homes in this small village don’t have plumbing, so residents wait in line at the well for hours every day. This is the part where you appreciate your shiny faucets in multiple rooms of your house. 
 
By the way, life in Kentucky isn’t that easy, either. Bopper and Mark choose the bike task because they’ve fixed a lot of bikes in their time. Mark comments that he never had a new bike growing up, he had to make one. Those skills put them in first place, so eventually it worked out, right? 
 
Bopper Don’t Fail Me Now!

You guys, Bopper slipped a little bit on the side of an African road last episode, and it tweaked the knee that he recently had surgery on, and now he can’t run! But he would rather cut off his knee than let it slow him down (although, I’m thinking that cutting off the knee actually would slow him down, so I hope he doesn’t have to make that decision) so he pushes through. Even when Army Dave and Army Wife are close behind, Bopper keeps going. Spoiler – he and Mark get their first first-place finish! Yay! 
 
JJ is a Whiny Crybaby

During a previous leg of the Race, the BPAs made a deal with Team Army and some other eliminated team that, should a U-Turn opportunity arise, the first team would U-Turn Big Brother. They had a secret handshake and swore oaths and promised firstborn children, because it was the most important priority on the Race.