'Survivor: One World'

Greg "Tarzan" Smith stays on top of "driving everyone nuts" duty. (ROBERT VOETS/CBS / March 28, 2012)

Previously: Karma came and smacked Colton upside the head in the form of a bacterial infection, and the merge happened, leaving the men and women at equal numbers.

The two tribes (now one tribe called Tikiano) return from Tribal Council to a feast of wine and cheese. I think cheese would be one of the things I would miss the most if I were on "Survivor." While I reminisce about cheese, Alicia is adding some whine to it, complaining about how Colton getting sick ruined her plans, and how he should have given her the immunity idol. Shut up, Alicia. I hope Christina joins with the men after how you treated her, and she votes your entitled self off.

Breakfast-making is going on, and Jay isn’t being nice about sharing. He’s not letting Tarzan have any coffee because he wasn’t on the tribe that won it. Or it may be that it’s just because it’s Tarzan who is wanting it. Tarzan worries that the men won’t be sticking together. Here’s the problem with that, Tarzan: The men who went to Salani found out that they liked their new tribe a whole lot better than their old one, and they’d rather stick with them.

The theme tonight seems to be Tarzan driving everyone crazy. I understand; he drives me crazy and I only have to spend an hour a week with him. I can’t imagine what living with him was like.

Reward Challenge Time! Digging and running and puzzles, oh my. The prize is pizza and beer, which does sound awesome. They’ve split them into two tribes for the challenge, which makes me think they did do the merge early, but they already had this challenge planned, and perhaps set up, so they just went with it. The orange tribe (Alicia, Jay, Troyzan, Christina, Sabrina, and Chelsea) wins, but by a very close margin. It seems to be Tarzan screwing up the puzzle that lost it for the other team. Dude, Tarzan is so going home tonight.

The pizza and beer reward is, indeed, awesome. They also get a note at the end of their feast that tells them there is still another Immunity Idol out there somewhere to be found. 

Back at camp, Michael lets Jonas know that Tarzan’s plan is to stick with the men’s alliance. Jonas is annoyed that Tarzan is making plans and having meetings without involving him. Jonas tries to explain strategy to Tarzan, and Tarzan gets pissed and doesn’t want to listen. Wow, this is the most I think Jonas has spoken all season. I hope it doesn’t mean he’s going home. And, probably not, because Tarzan is “dropping out of the tribe” which is the awesomest strategy ever and should really work for him (that was my sarcastic voice, if you couldn’t tell). He’ll go really far in a game with 13 other people and no one on his side.

Troyzan gets up super early to look for the Immunity Idol while everyone else is asleep, and he actually finds it. I’m OK with that, because he’s been growing on me. The “Troyzan” thing is still annoying, but he’s a lot less annoying than a lot of other people in this game.

At the Imunity Challenge, Jeff reveals the Immunity Necklace. I wonder whose job it is to make these things. Your job would essentially be arts and crafts. It’s a balancing/endurance challenge, which are usually anybody’s game, although the wind certainly isn’t helping. Tarzan is first out, which adds fuel to the fire that he’s the one going home tonight.

“Troy’s balls haven’t moved in a really long time.” Don’t think we don’t know what you’re trying to do, there, Jeff. It’s down to Troyzan and Kat. Wow, Kat is actually being kind-of good at stuff this episode, but it’s Troyzan who wins immunity.

And now comes the mad scurrying that happens every week after the Immunity Challenge and before Tribal Council. Jay wants Jonas to go first, because he’s the strongest player on the old Manono. This works well for Kim, because she gets rid of a man and a Manono tribe member at the same time. Troyzan is right to point out that they don’t need to vote out Jonas just yet, because there are other people they can get rid of (Tarzan) and while Jonas is good, he’s also great around camp, and Michael is a stronger threat physically.

Jonas is freaked out that he’s on the block, and he apologizes to Tarzan, who thinks he is completely sincere, but he’s not. Now Kat’s name is being thrown around as well. Geez, she just stopped being useless -- don’t get rid of her know. 

Now Tarzan and Chelsea are fighting about laundry. And I get her point. He thinks it’s about whether there was "poop" is his pants (which, ew); her point was that she had already scrubbed her clothes in the ocean and was just boiling them as a last point when he threw his dirty shorts in.

We’re down the to annoying/threat debate. Do you get rid of someone because you can’t tolerate spending another three days around them, or do you pick off the threats before they get a chance to win immunity and you can’t get rid of them? I can see the strategic point of the latter, but it’s also real tempting to get rid of Tarzan.

At Tribal Council, Jonas completely throw Mike under the bus (and damn you Tarzan, for using the same saying, although you screwed it up in the next breath.) Jonas then brings up voting out Kat, who is completely clueless, as usual. Aww, you know what? Kat’s growing on me.

The rest of Tribal Council goes like this: bicker, bicker, bicker; Tarzan sucks and we like Jonas. But then they vote Jonas off anyway. I think where Jonas went wrong was trying to get people to vote off Mike instead of him; no one was even talking about getting rid of Mike. He should have concentrated on Tarzan instead, whom no one likes. He could have at least convinced Chelsea, who may have been able to sway the rest of them.

Next week: The men realize that they’ve given the women the advantage in numbers. We’ll have to wait to see if the women decide to act on it.

Credits: Jonas is gracious, and glad that at least everyone recognized that he was a good cook.