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'Snooki & JWOWW' recap, season 2 premiere

For those of you have been having Jerzday withdrawals, we now have Snooki & JWOWW Tuesdays.

And, unlike last season, each episode is an hour instead of a half an hour.

I’m not going to lie: I do find both of these girls extremely entertaining. However, the first season of this show, at times, was like watching paint dry. I mean, I’m a girl I know what we do on a daily basis; it’s nothing special or magical. It was straight-up boring.

However, this season I am excited for! The girly-girl in me is dying to see Snooki have the baby and become a mom, and Jenni get engaged to Roger!

The season premiere was fun, but nothing special. It was like a catch up on what the girls have been up to and where they are in their lives post-"Jersey Shore."

Snooki is living with Jionni in his family’s basement in the apartment/man cave. I was a bit surprised by this because if Jenni can afford a nice, big house, Snooki has to be making big bucks too, if not more! I can only guess that they are doing it for the support aspect for when she first has the baby.

Jenni is living with Roger in a home of their own, which as I mentioned before, is nice and big. They are doing well but Jenni is hungry for a "big, juicy ring." Roger explains that she has to work on some things in order to get a ring and that he will do it when he is no longer feeling the pressure.

I didn’t find her honesty for a ring obnoxious. She didn’t even appear on the rector scale compared to say, Kenya from RHWOA.  Jenni hints but does not come across desperate.

Jenni and Jionni go shopping for baby stuff because apparently they had not shopped at all for the baby, when she is eight months pregnant! They go shopping for their furniture set, but she later goes to do the rest of the registering with her Mom.

Jenni also set out to shop for a baby shower gift and dragged Roger along kicking and screaming. He has no idea what he is looking at, but asks if she got Snooki a breast pump. She says she got her a portable one that was like $300 so she can “pump those t------ on the go!”

The night before the shower, Jenni and Roger throw a party at their house for everyone to watch the MMA fight that their friend, Frankie Edgar, is fighting in to defend his title. He is a local from Toms River, N.J., and they all know him, including Snooki and Jionni who watch it at home alone.

Roger has been nervous for this fight for days, and Jenni is nervous because if Frankie doesn’t win, Roger will flip out. The friends all come over, and are getting the party started when they go to switch to the fight and it is not coming on. Roger gets mad and Jenni jumps on the phone to straighten the issue out with the company.

She starts off nice, explaining how much she is freaking out, but within a couple minutes is telling the woman on the phone that if the fight isn’t on in thirty seconds, she’s going to throw the cable box out the effin window. Seems Roger isn’t the only one with a temper, but I’d be lying if I said I never got heated with the cable company.

Roger and the gang load into a van somewhat like a drunken circus of clowns. Everyone has a full solo cup n hand, and one of the friends runs out with the dips and chips. Just when they are about to pull out, one of the friends runs out to report that the fight is on, so the whole car full of non-sober party-goers are fighting to get out of the car and run back into the house!

BEST PART: Roger goes to jump over the couch and doesn’t clear it and flips with a full drink in hand. Someone was definitely eager for this fight to happen.

When the party is coming to a close, Roger and Jenni’s best friend, Yanice, get into a scuffle over a misinterpreted joke. Yanice had one too many and did not get hat Roger was kidding, and he was clearly heated after the lost fight.

Roger said something about how PETA would be offended by how many birds how to die in order to make her feathered earrings and she said “Whose Peta? You only know one of my exes!” [Face palm] Yes, Peta = Peter pronounced with a strong New York accent.

Yanice got all mad, Jenni tried to get them both to stop, and Roger left and slept at a friend’s house for the night. 

The next morning, Yanice and Gay Joey come over to head to Nicole’s shower, and everyone is clearly hung over and Jenni sticks up for her man and Yanice realized she has to apologize to Roger. “I don’t like talking to Roger; it’s like talking to my father.”

They head to the shower and immediately Snooki notices that Jenni is wearing stockings, and she confesses to not shaving her legs, let alone showering, and is extremely hung over.  She laughs but makes Jenni promise to never wear stockings again.

Snooki wanted the party to be classy. Not “tea and crumpets” fancy, but “pinky up with a glass of wine” classy. What she got, was a fancy baby shower at a country club hosted by Jionni’s mother. Snooki said it was almost too fancy, and was really missing a splash of tacky animal print which was nowhere to be found.

During the shower you get to see everyone’s favorite slutty friend, Ryder, crazy Deena and her mom, Sammi, Ronnie’s mother and grandmother, and Snooki’s parent. She invited over one-hundred people and opening gifts alone seemed to take hours.

Halfway through, Jenni dips out with Yanice, Deena and the Gay Joeys to find Jionni on the golf course and bring him back. Little did they know that Jionni did not make it through a round of golf, felt sick, and had to be taken to the hospital from what seemed like dehydration to me. Snooki didn’t even know at this point because he didn’t want to upset her during her shower.

Things I Learned on This Episode of Snooki & JWOWW

There are things called “nipple shields”

When you are pregnant, and you laugh, your belly button pops out.

“The Deena Job” = Lumineers

Roger gets pedicures with Jenni every week, and makes it look manly-ish.

Agree with me or agree to disagree with me, let me know on Twitter, @KT_HUTCH

Copyright © 2014, The Baltimore Sun
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