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'Snooki and JWOWW' recap, 'Maine Squeeze'

On this week's episode, Snooki and Jionni get to being Baby Lorenzo home and start their lives as parents, and Jenni heads with Roger to Maine, where she proves she is wifey-material.

Snooki holds little Lorenzo while he continued to “fart like a man.” Despite him being excessively gassy, Snooki glowingly talks about him and is surprised at how natural motherhood comes to her now that they are home. 

Meanwhile, Jenni and Roger head to his family’s cabin in Maine, where Roger is in heaven, and Jenni is in hell, despite holding her feelings inside. Roger jokes about seeing himself live there, whereas Jenni responded with “No!”

They go fishing and Jenni actually shows some skill, reeling in three fish to Roger’s zero. Jenni was like when it comes to fishing: Ready to go, happy to do it but did NOT want to touch the fish she caught. She eventually held one and threw him back, but it took a ton of coaxing on Roger’s part. 

The boat also had an unexpected stowaway, a huge spider Jenni names Charlotte. Not on does she crawl around and freak Jenni out, but then Roger announces the spider has thousands of babies in her web as well. If that thing had come at me, I would have jumped overboard.

Back in Domesticated-ville, Snooki gives Lorenzo his first bath at home since Deena is planning on coming to visit. The whole idea freaks out Jionni and he swears that the doctor told him that bathing wasn’t good for the baby. Snooki does it anyway, and Lorenzo seemed to enjoy it.

Snooki and Jionni make quite the cute, young-parent couple. They take turns getting up throughout the night to change and feed Lorenzo. Jionni got pooped on several times, and Snooki high-fived him when he came back to bed, saying that they should enter the Diaper Olympics.

Jenni passes Roger’s tests with flying colors and shows that she is down for whatever he wants to do. Despite the occasional scream and screech, she went clamming with Roger and his dad, where she was ankle-deep in mud, searching for clams. She even ate a raw clam after much taunting from the men.

And if that wasn’t enough, Roger takes her lobster fishing the next day, where the job entailed packing the bait nets full of dead fish that smelled five-days old, according to Jenni. She gagged a couple of times, but generally took it like a champ.

Her biggest issue all weekend was never having anywhere to pee. Out at the cabin, no running water, so they told her to pee behind the house, but she could not bring herself to do it. Later, on the boat, she was forced to pee in a bucket and then carry the bucket and dump it overboard.

For all the women out there reading this, imagine the embarrassment of peeing in a cup at the doctor and multiply that by 100! Carrying a bucket of your own urine through a boat full of men and handing it off to them to dispose would be mortifying. Roger, of course, wasn’t short on jokes.

The weekend in Maine is a total success. Roger got to spend time with his father, and told him that things have been going great with Jenni, and he is planning on taking it to the next level. Jenni hung out with Roger’s family and you could tell that she fit right in, and Roger was happily observing the interactions, too. 

Will they get engaged next episode? I can’t wait to find out.

Things I Learned on This Episode of "Snooki And JWOWW":

• “Bear Balls,” when served in a dish, are most likely bear-meatballs and not actual testicles.

• Many women, when fishing, are “cool, calm, and collected ... until you catch something.”

• Bloodworms live in mud and are a type of worm that will actually bite you.

Agree with me or agree to disagree with me, let me know what you thought on Twitter: @KT_HUTCH.

Copyright © 2015, The Baltimore Sun
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