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'The Real Housewives of Miami' recap: 'A Cause for Concern'

Tonight’s episode of "RHOM" gave us an inside look into Lea’s annual Black Gala and showed the true faces of some cast members.

Last week’s preview of tonight’s episode made me think that though she was led astray, Alexia would wind up doing the right thing by attending the gala, an event Lea has thrown the last 19 years to provide funds for at-risk youth. Then again, maybe not...

Lisa and Lenny allow us into their worlds even more as we see that they’ve finally come to somewhat of an agreement that they will use a surrogate to carry their baby. Lisa is still not completely sold on the idea; she wants to feel her baby grow inside of her and will miss that emotional bond. Lenny, being the successful doctor he is, approaches the situation from a more scientific platform. That leads Lisa to refer to Lenny as being “insensitive” through the majority of the episode.

In between planning her gala and being hated by the Cuban Mean Girls, Lea reminds us that she’s writing a book! And then just as quickly as she mentions it, it’s dropped again because Taylor Hicks enters the building (ummmm... He’s relevant?) Lea shamelessly hits on him for a while until the jeweler that donates to the Gala, Jeffrey Rackover, shows up. And he sure does come bearing gifts! He lets Lea borrow  a set of diamond earrings that are 50 carats EACH. He also lends her a 95 carat-diamond necklace, for a whopping grand total of about $30 million dollars. I don’t get why these can’t just go to the at-risk children?

On the other side of the line, we find the Cuban Mean Girls. Adriana, Marysol, Ana and Alexia. They’ve rented what they refer to as a “stripper bus” to take them to South Beach’s Gay Polo Tournament with intentional plans to boycott Lea and all of her “Draconian antics.” What they don’t know is that Alexia is still very much planning on going to Lea’s Gala because the two families have always supported each other’s endeavors. The ladies also have their good friend Lauren Foster, who Marysol describes as being “transgendered and absolutely fabulous,” along for the ride. Fans of the show may remember Lauren from last season, when she got into a huge fight with Lea’s best friend, the self-proclaimed Drag Queen Extraordinaire, Elaine Lancaster. She certainly hasn’t lost one ounce of venom in her words for this go-around on the show.

At the end of the polo match, Alexia finds herself getting bullied by those people who used to be on the show into blowing off Lea. I frequently wish these women would just use their own judgment. Alexia, who has been hoarse and sick since last episode, is caught in a battle until she leaves the Strippermobile and heads home. It is then that she ultimately lets the "RHOM" cast offs have their way, calling Lea and leaving a voicemail that she is too sick to make it.

At the gala, we finally see Joanna for the first time, Karent Sierra from "RHOM" Season 2 shows up. And no one is bidding. On anything.

We go through about five minutes of awkward situations, as Lea is auctioning things and no one is speaking up, until Flo Rida joins in on the fun. Seriously, this episode is full of the most random things. Did I mention Dennis Rodman was placed at the same table as Lea, Joanna and Lisa?

Finally, a Polish woman donates $10,000 to the cause SIMPLY because she deems Joanna Krupa the most fabulously beautiful Polish woman in the room. And all ends well.

This was definitely another episode about the quotes though, and Lisa Hochstein had most of them. Seriously, that woman gives the most hilarious confessional interviews ever! From calling Lea out on borrowing her jewelry to calling Joanna out on her fake bangs, Lisa is definitely the one who shows up to break up the monotony of these women fighting 24/7!

Copyright © 2014, The Baltimore Sun
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