It's finally here -- "The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills" season three opener. The title, "Down and Left Out in Beverly Hills" signaled that we were in for some childish shenanigans this episode, and the ladies delivered -- starting with good old Lisa.
Lisa Vanderpump is having an anniversary party for her restaurant, Villa Blanca, and doesn't invite long-time neighbor, Adrienne Maloof. The two ladies have had issues in the past -- the usual reality TV drama -- but Taylor Armstrong still spills the news about the party, asking Adrienne to shop for party dresses with her.
Taylor, who "gained 10 pounds" and can no longer fit any of her tiny dresses, looks all doe-eyed and confused when she realizes her error. Lisa and Adrienne were neighbors, for goodness sake. They have to be BFFS, right? Never mind the fact that Lisa and her husband, Ken, actually moved to get away from Adrienne.
Well, I have cut friends off for subtweeting me so, maybe I’m not the best person to give perspective on this but Taylor, still should've figured there would be drama.
Now let's meet new RHOBH, Yolanda Foster, who is married to David Foster, a big-time producer, composer and songwriter. She was brought into the fray by Lisa because apparently, they go way back. It's so silly how these shows do that -- "Oh yes, she's been my friend forever, and even though this show follows me throughout my every day life, you've never heard me make mention of her until this moment."
Brandi Gianville, who used to be a "Friend of the Housewives" but is now an actual cast member, is feeling a little anxious about seeing the ladies again. Taylor's still peeved with her for some of the comments Brandi made during the reunion special.
Brandi was most nervous about seeing Kim Richards. According to Brandi, fresh-from-rehab Kim blames her for her past substance abuse issues. Eh, not buying that. Either way, Brandi covers in front of Lisa and Yolanda, claiming that she and Kim made up. Lisa calls bull, explaining to Yolanda that those are the kinds of things that get Brandi in trouble. Welcome to Passive Aggressiva.
Gets introduced to Yolanda one of the new characters, whose ex, Mohamed Hadid, Brandi knows from back in the day. Of course, Brandi promptly puts her foot in her mouth, basically saying it's a small town -- you know everyone, you've slept with everyone. It's confusing.
Is Brandi claiming to have slept with Mohamed, or is she calling Yolanda a scarlet woman? Either way, Yolanda promptly gives her the stink eye, and we've got ourselves a season opener, folks!
From what I can tell, Lisa's party doesn't look all that happening. That oiled up, male angel at the door would have sent me running. Adrienne shouldn't be too hurt.
Regardless, Adrienne is out to make amends. She sends Lisa this awful flower arrangement. Kyle Richards described it best saying, "I think it was supposed to be an olive branch, but it looks like the whole damn tree came in the room."
The cattiness is phenomenal.Copyright © 2014, The Baltimore Sun