More quick results: Meryl & Maks are in jeopardy. James & Peta are safe. This means either Meryl, Charlie, or Amy is going home. And Candace is in the finals. WRONG WRONG WRONG.

James Maslow & Peta Murgatroyd, Cha cha

L. A. Reid is there to talk to James, because Michael Jackson is James's idol and he and Peta are dancing to a song from the new Michael Jackson album of previously unreleased songs.

It's all Michael Jackson stuff and neon and moonwalking and crotch-grabbing and whatever.

Before going to the judges, Tom Bergeron points out the co-writer of that song, Paul Anka. Look him up, kids.

Carrie Ann says it was spectacular. Len says that there was plenty of cha cha content, even with all the MJ flourishes. Kenny calls it electrifying. Bruno says it was effortlessly cool and on fire. Then he grabs his crotch. I'm scarred for life.

Scores: Carrie Ann: 10; Len: 10; Kenny: 10; Bruno: 10

Meryl Davis & Maksim Chmerkovskiy, Jive

Kristi Yamaguchi came to give Meryl encouragement, both as a figure skater and as a former "Dancing with the Stars" champion.

Meryl's working some sort of prim co-ed thing with her costume. Fun jive, though.

Len calls it fantastic. Kenny says the kicks and flicks were sending up sparks and the synchronization was great. Bruno calls them the king and queen of rock 'n roll. He says the movement was clean and sharp and that stylistically it was impeccable.

Carrie Ann makes a crack about Maks kissing her. Then Bruno demands some sugar and Maks obliges. Kenny begs for love and Maks embraces him, then Len, then Carrie Ann again. It's a lovefest tonight.

Carrie Ann compliments Meryl's costume, with its streamlined effect emphasizing her movements.

Scores: Carrie Ann: 10; Len: 10; Kenny: 10; Bruno: 10

Maks is going a little nuts up in the kiss 'n' cry loft, throwing stuff around. Erin quips, "I don't know what he's doing and I don't care as long as he's not kissing anybody." I never got to say "quip" in relation to Brooke. I'm so glad we got Erin this season.

Macy's "Stars of Dance" is a "tribute to old Hollywood." It's the regular pros and troupe, though, so it doesn't feel that exciting.

Candace Cameron Bure & Mark Ballas, Jazz

This is Janet Jackson via Bob Fosse, with the costuming and choreography.

Len calls it "tight and together." Kenny says it reminds him of the great ladies of Broadway (really?) and mentions the Bob Fosse influence. Carrie Ann says it was precise, but she would've liked to see a touch more attitude in some of the hard-hitting moments.

Scores: Carrie Ann: 9; Len: 10; Kenny: 10; Bruno: 9