This week on "The Amazing Race," we get a sneak peek of CBS's new slapstick comedy: "Boyfriend Ryan and The Professor." It's preceded by "Lexi and The Cabbie," which is almost as good. Other stuff happens, too, and there's 95 percent less screaming from the Twins, so it's really all wonderful.
Let's catch up on last week: Team Dominate and Team Goat Farmers missed a flight and ended up hours and hours behind the lead pack. They vowed to run the rest of the leg together, and we last saw Dominate watching the Farmers try to perform a synchronized swimming routine, failing over and over because of Brent's fear of water.
Meanwhile, Team Rock On left their backpacks in a cab, and the cab disappeared. Abba's passport was in the cab, too, so when they checked in at the Pit Stop Phil told them to produce their passports.
At the beginning of this episode, we see Rock On head to a hotel to make some phone calls. It gets dark.
The swimming pool is about to close, and the swim coach tells Brent he has one more chance. Abbie and Ryan cheer them on, but they still fail. Coach hands them their clue and says they've incurred a four-hour penalty. I think that's a first, where the activity closes before the team is ready to give up.
The two teams caravan to the Roadblock, the padlocked Trees of Love. Abbie and Josh take it, they are so tired and slow. Josh's mind is a bit quicker, though, and he finishes while Abbie is stuck. Josh then gives Abbie a hug and helps her finish her last padlocks. That was a seriously sweet moment, you guys. Boyfriend Ryan hugs Josh and they all leave together.
Phil is at the mat with the cheerful accordion player. The two teams try to synchronize their jumps onto the mat, but they are too tired to coordinate. Phil informs them that there's still a team "out there," having trouble on the course, so he awards them spots four and five. The penalty will be assessed at the beginning of the next leg. How about that for a finish?
Oh, but it's not done. Rock On has contacted the embassy and anyone else they can think of, then they go to the mat to say farewell to Phil. Phil tells them that they are officially the last team to arrive, but as crazy fate would have it, it's a non-elimination leg. They can still race, with a speed bump, but if they don't get a passport, they're out. Interesting.
Lexi and The Cabbie
Trey and Lexi are the first to depart, but no start times are given so I don't know how teams are spaced out. They have to go to Building 6 at an agricultural academy and then report to a large chemistry auditorium.
Their first driver drops them off at what looks like an abandoned subway tunnel full of graffiti and broken glass. They're thinking it's not so much an agricultural academy as a den of lost passports and broken dreams, so they flag down a new cab.
The new driver has swag, y'all. He's in his 60s, maybe, built like a Russian mobster. He's wearing a pink striped shirt, pink tie, and a mint green plaid sport coat. He's just chillin' in the cab, smoking a cigarette with the windows up. Lexi tells him to go back somewhere, he's like, "Girl, why are you telling me where to go?" He then delivers them to an abandoned building.
Something about that green coat compels Texi to stay with their driver. They peer out an open window (somebody had to open a window, even though it's raining) and a passing car splashes both of their faces. It's a great day in Moscow, everyone! Cabbie takes them to a hotel for some translating, because his magical outfit doesn’t seem to be able to convince them that wherever he drops them is the right place.
At the hotel, we see that Cabbie is also rocking some white shoes. Because, of course he is. They finally get to the right building and bid him farewell.
Jaymes and James and The Cabbie
The Chippendales have better luck with their driver. He takes them to the correct building on his first try, where they find out that the task doesn't open until 8 a.m. Their cab driver decides to hang out in the hall with them. They introduce themselves to their driver as Jaymes and James, and he's all, "#@&$ Americans and their redundant names of redundancy."
By the way, the Chipps are shocked and delighted to be the first team there, because it has never happened. By the way, again, they are wearing sleeveless shirts on this leg.
Put the pencils down.
The Roadblock is run by a Professor. He's a thin, stern, Russian professor. He has three lines: "The next round is starting;" "Put the pencils down;" and “It's not correct." He is not someone to mess with.
Let's take a moment to go over the challenge. Russia is the world's largest country and it has nine different time zones. On a large screen at the front of the classroom, three slides will flash for a short period of time. The first says what the current time is in Moscow. The second shows the different zones, labeled as Moscow +4, then unlabeled sections as +6, +7, and so on.