What, did you think I was kidding?
Did you think there weren't really any Best of the Best of the Best awards?
Not only did I come up with some wild and crazy categories (a few of which were actually thought up by Midnight Sunner Patchen), I had famed Baltimore Sun designer Carrie Lyle put them together. I had Curry printing print them out.
And I frantically ran to Dollar Tree yesterday to buy some faux-wood frames to put them in. Also, thanks to Midnight Sunner Jmgiordano for helping me frame them.
I've also got to thank all of the bar owners who turned out to accept the awards in person -- especially considering they had no idea what they were getting an award for. Hee hee.
Without further delays, here is the full list of the 2009 Best of the Best of the Best Awards ...
Category: Seriously, who buys enough of these toys to keep you afloat?
Winner: Atomic Pop
Best In-House DJs and Picklebacks
Bar We Most Love to Hate
Most Awkward Time and Place to be Handed a Condom
Lunchtime at RA Sushi
Best Way to Skirt the Smoking Ban
Max's Tobacco Company
Biggest Meathead Magnet
MaGerk's Pub & Grill
Second Biggest Meathead Magnet
The Greene Turtle
Best Place to Get Molested by a Bachelorette Party
Power Plant Live
Best Bar to Get Day Drunk
Woody's Rum Bar & Island Grill
Most Redundantly Named New Bar
Muggsy's Mug House
King Of Wikipedia and Other Online Sourcing
Most Royal, Regal Commenter
Most Connected Commenter
Best Elvis Impression
Best Snarky Comments
Midnight Sun Mixologist
Best "Who's On First" Franchise
Don't Know Tavern and No Idea Tavern
We Can't Stand Hipsters But We Keep Coming Back
Most Maniacal Laugh
Joe Edwardsen of Joe Squared Pizza
Nobody Writes About Local Hip-Hop Like You, Baby
The Best Brewpub in all of Mount Vernon
The Brewer's Art
Editor's note: Sorry for the lateness of this post. Since our computer system is apparently deserving a Worst of the Worst of the Worst award, I didn't receive any of Sam's messages asking me to publish this post. No cool framed award for that, though.